This is a topic that can be quite difficult to talk or write about. I don't know if this is just something for me and our family or if it is quite common around german speaking families to if this is a THING all over the world..
It's about what to call the grandparents. Around here the most common name to call them is OMA and OPA. Then you get variations of this as in OMAMA and OPAPA or OMI and OPI. Another name you can call them is GROSSMAMA and GROSSPAPA and the variations GROSI and GROPI. That's basically it. Occasionally you get the odd NONNA and NONNO which are the italian terms for grandpa and grandma.
So before Nathanael was born I wanted to talk about this with Marcel and also my parents as in what they want to be called by their grandchildren. However, no one really wanted to talk about this and discuss that topic as everyone seemed to think that it will just fall into place.
The day Nathanael was born came along and of course he wasn't talking by then but we kind of had to call our parents a different name now. So no one wanted to be GROSI and GROPI as it does have some sort of elderly sound to it.. So we ended up calling both mine and Marcel's parents OMA and OPA. After a few months I felt uncomfortable with this as it didn't really distinguish between the two and how should Nate know about whom I was talking about when I say OMA. So I started to call my parents OMI and OPI. But then Marcel's parents kind called themselves OMI and OPI as well when they were talking with Nate. Maybe I should add that I'm not really close with my in-laws so it wasn't really any of my business to tell them how they should call themselves..
Nate is now 22 months old and Aurelia is 3 months old and we still don't have a solution for this dilemma. It probably seems to be nothing of a problem for most but it is really bothering me. Especially after all 8 of us spent a Sunday afternoon together and it got really confusing with the the OMAs and OPAs... also for Nathanael. And Marcel's parents started to call themselves OMA TWO and OPA TWO which annoys me. And I mean I get furious inside. Yes, inside. I would never tell them but arrrgghhh. I get angry just writing about it now.
As you can see it is my personal dilemma and I wonder if other parents out there feel the same about this...
I am 100% with you Melli. This is a toughie. Growing up I always got so confused when I would get a birthday or christmas card. Both my Grandmothers would sign off with "love Gran and Grandad" and as they all had very similar handwriting I was always a bit unsure as to who the cards were from. I really clearly remember calling both sets of my grandparents and saying to my Mum's parents that I would call them "Grandma and Grampy" and to my Dad's parents that I would call them "Gran and Grandad" Unfortunately both sets of grandparents took no notice and continued to sign cards "Love Gran and Grandad" Thanks!! As I got older I tended to call my Dad's Mum exclusively Gran and my Mum's Mum I go between Gran, G and occasionally "Nan-arrrr" (I unfortunately lost both my Grandads in my early teens).
I wanted to have none of this confusion when I had Dylan so I asked our parents quite a few times during my pregnancy to pick a grandparent name for themselves. My Mum ummmmed and arrrrred about it for ages and my Mummy-in-Law just said she'd wait until my Mum picked! Grrrr. In the UK there are loads of options. For the lady grandparent there is Grandma, Grandmother, Grandmama, Gran, Granny, Nan, Nanny, Nanna and for the male grandparent there is Grandfather, Grandpa, Grampy, Gramps, Grandad and Grandy. So I kept on pestering but to no avail.
Dylan was born and I took matters into my own hands, sort of. Joe's Mum said she'd quite fancy being called Gran but this was problematic as I already had 2 Grans so I opted for her to be called Granerie (her name is Valerie so I just stuck Gran to the front). I am not too sure she was overjoyed at this but it doesn't really matter as it didn't stick, I'll explain in a bit. Some people at my Mum's work started referring to her has Granny when Dylan was born and my ever helpful brother started calling her "Nanna Pat" (a reference to Pat Butcher in Eastenders and that my Mum's middle name is Patricia). About 3 days into me and my bro jokingly calling my Mum "Nanna Pat" she snapped and got really upset about it (which I felt really bad about because me and James really meant no harm by it) so we just called her Granny, which again is kind of irrelevant as it didn't stick! The Grandfathers were easy. I started referring to my Dad as "PeePop" years ago so he's always been Dylan's GPop and Joe's Dad has always been Grandad. Easy peasy!
I didn't really take Dylan's personality into account when doing all this. He seems to have taken after me and is an awkward little bugger at times. When he started to talk he would refused to say "Granerie" or "Granny". He called Joe's Dad "Dad-Dad" and my Dad GPop but for the most part wouldn't call either of his Grandmothers anything at all. Then the week after Eilys was born that all changed. Joe's Mum came to look after him while I was in labour and then took him out for several days out the week after and he suddenly started to call her "Mmom", we presume because Joe calls her Mum, and it sort of stuck! And before you think it, no it really doesn't bother me. He says it completely differently to how he says Mumma or Mummy for me so it's fine! And then a couple of weeks later he randomly started calling my Mum "GMum". Yay! Problem solved!
Try not to stress Melli. Nate will probably sort it all out for you! If not, there are loads of UK options you could try out xx
Thanks for reading xx
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